Hello, I just started learning kendo and I went to a seminar with my group, we were practicing and I was experiencing many difficulties since I am new; my technique is not good and that sort of things, on top of that I was really nervous.
So I asked one of the instructors, after all I thought he could guide me and I was pretty confident in him helping me.
But it didn't turn out so well; as I was walking back to my place he struck me so hard that I let go of the shinai.
Everyone went silent as he yelled at me and though I admit I was at fault the he humiliated me in many ways. Also since that day every time I move my hand it really hurts.
So I was wondering if every time I get something wrong I'm supposed to get beaten or humiliated like that.
I thought kendo was also a way of meditation, a way to unify the body and the mind, and also a way to find peace to my mind.
But since then I don't know what's true I used to empty my mind before practice, but nowadays I'm so confused and full of sorrow, I didn't knew I had to hurt everyone.
Now I can't even hold my shinai without almost bleeding my hands.
I'll really appreciate your help, thanks for reading I don't really want to trouble you or anyone.Answer:
Thanks for your post. Let me make sure the situation.
You went up to an
instructor to ask a question, right? And as you were walking back to wherever you were before asking him a question, he struck your arm?
Did he tell you why he did that?
I have no idea why he did such a thing to you. Do you think you did something completely wrong to make him so mad that he had to hit you so hard?
Say you did something wrong. OK? Just hypothetically speaking.
He had to tell you what you did wrong.
I always try not to get emotional because being emotional at the dojo
and especially towards my students does not do any good.
If you did not do anything wrong and he hit you for no reason, he has some serious issue. He is not really practicing kendo
I really think you should ask him why you got hit; otherwise, you keep wondering.
Please do remember there are many senseis
out there and there are many ways that they deal with their students. Whatever the way they choose to deal with you is the way you are taught, right?
Now if you really want to practice and apply kendo
teachings, deal with your feelings now and go and ask him a reason why he did what he did to you. You must know WHY. So you can fix it.
Be brave to go and ask. Be humble when asking for a reason. Keep calm when you get an answer. Encourage yourself to improve your understandings of kendo
. You will be the best student.